PART 2: Electric Boogaloo

Alright, so its been longer than i said, but FUCK YOU, living out of a hotel is harder than it sounds. Always getting free food and sleeping well. Damn.

Anyway , straight into things. Thats my badass swords. I use bad grammar because its the only way to fondly describe swords. My family is hated by scotland so it's like one of 3 actual pieces of family memoribilia that has our coat of arms on it. So it should mean a lot etc. etc.

I just liked it because you could fight with ACTUAL SWORDS in our house. Damn.

but first I should really give you something to cleanse the "maitland house" pallate.

Ha ha.

Good anecdote though. I made friends with one Callianne Bachman simply based on "I Heart Alberta Beef" merchandise. Though we pretended it was I heart alberta cows because she is vegetarian.

Seriously try it. you will make friends.
I know you looked at my house and thought "Sure its wierd but not wierd enough to produce Cam's Genius". I forgot to mention i spent almost all my time in the basement pictured above. Its like a 100 year old hermit's place. full of so much crap. Clown stuff/ magic stuff/ toy stuff/ old computers/ 1000 books (probably literally). Its just fantastic. I dug through the piles to try to find good stuff but got tired.

there were a few.
Thats just for Dan. Sadly i dont have an awesome Camera that focuses on anything small at all but seriously. So awesome. I kind of wish my dad was still a tabacconist just to get wierd crap like this. Commemorative matches...geeze.
I jsut took a picture of these matches because i could totally imagine a priest coaching the team. Priests should always coach things.
This is the only actual historical artifact I own. Its like a 100 year old watch my great grandfather owned. If i was less hip and more indie I'd wear a Joey Jeremiah hat and carry this sucker on a chain around with me all the time.

Once i turn thirty i'll be allowed to do it and maintain awesomeness so I look forward to that.
Also I love my parent's wierd liquor collection. I always loved it as a kid. These are kind of normal bottles because the others were obscured with clown stuff but if anyone has seen my half-burned copy of the 1970 "Playboy bar book" you know the kind of shit they'd have in there.
Do you remember your favorite childhood toy? Mine was this. No , not the wireless networking device but the bottle of Bol's "Ballerina" a crappy 70s Apricot Liqeur. But it has a windup ballerina in the bottle so when you rest it she dances. And the liqeur is full of gold flakes, bigger than Goldschlager. I remember her tiny feet always kicking and the song too. I also remember my parents always took it away from me probably because it was depressing to see their kid playing with a liquor bottle.

Ahh the memories.
WOAH! Its what you've not been caring about or waiting for. My crappy bedroom. Though check out the awesome outside. All hoops magazine and Nintendo Power posters. I guess I retain some cool though with the Fear and Loathing poster and radical Chip n' Pepper sticker on the bottom.

But , you ask, why havent you just taken all that crap off? I dont know. Lazy I guess. There used to be more. yeah. lazy.

Oh and I didnt ever even TRY to get laid in my room. I guess this door kind of makes it a sanctuary from caring about anything.

Ahhhh nothing says emotionally unavailable manchild like an immaculate robot collection. No seriously , there is a book on it and the guy who wrote it went on to make this...so I dont feel so bad.

But yeah the Jessica Simpson DVD doesn't help convince anyone I'm not a wierdo...
That or the bunk beds.............