Liz' Going Away Party Photo-stravanganza

Lots of people think it's dumb and/or annoying to take so many photos of parties and post them online. Yes, it's a thankless trade, but the life of a drunken photo taker is like uhhhh being a surgeon and cutting open people and harvesting sweet organs of "oh man I remember that".

Liz is going away to Amsterdam. This shocked us all as we heart her (though not as much as Gorrman). Last night I didn't heart her enough to make her a first priority but God taught me a harsh lesson about that.

P.S. Check out the Canadian flag, thats how you know she isn't in Amsterdam yet.

see, sometimes you go to take a photo of something assuredly wickedawesome happening and you miss it. It's an art. Maybe it's just Gina's sweet earrings I wanted to capture. I dont remember
Kaki and I attempted to recreate the classic "Shoel Photo". I was surprised as it produced nearly the same good looking results. This should be applied to further photography but it would sadly produce a photoset where the photographer was in every one. I must find a way to wrap my arms around my subjects without getting myself in the crossfire.
Speaking of sweet poses...when i uploaded this photo I couldnt remember why I ever took it...

BUT LOOK AT THEM? Film kids have the rockstar lean down to a tea. Those motherfuckers are so non-chalant you are like "Kellen...Kaki...just give up...they can't be asked"

Marek lives with Shoel soon. He must become accustomed to larger comfier chairs than usual.
We'll miss you while you're shopping carting with Dutch people

BYE LIZ!!!!!!!!!

CAM

P.s. Jenn Doucet, do you have an email I can contact you on? we need to have better chatting than you reading my overreactions and commenting. I need increased Jem interactivity!!

Dear Professor,

When I school someone on Wilde's expression of Aesthetic Utopianism, especially the class annoying dude, regardless of the "learning agreement" I should be able to:

a) Stand up on my desk

b) Yell " SCHOOL'D" or perhaps "YOU GOT SERVED"

c) Have everyone who is in agreement on this schoolin' (including you Doctor) pull hats over their eyes, cross their arms or simply comically look away in shame for the schoolee and saw in an enthralling chorus "awwwwwwwww" or to a lesser extent "shiiiiiiiiiiit"

d) I may be allowed to choose to end it with the statement "Naw, you ain't worth it.", a "suck it", "Flying suck it" or some sort of preformance of "The People's Elbow" on they ass.

Oh, and also

If I talk about the guy who painted this:
It doesn't imply I want you to segue into a conversation about the guy who wrote this:
If you are smart enough to know these two people, don't be stupid enough to base your conversations on your amusement that two words sound alike.

CAM

A Dip Into The Mailbag:

Dear Cam,

I'm a long time reader, first time writer.

My friends and I got into an arguement the other night. My Brother John says that your sexual neurosis are deep seeded but my co-worker Alice says that it's a superficial cry for attention. I thought I'd go straight to the source.

Love your stuff

P.S. Do you have any more photos of places you've been recently?

Brian Engleton
Butte MN


Dear Brian,

Let me tell you about a dream I had last night. I went to bed full of good food, Rhianna's questionable melon, and images of Scarlette Johannson in various stages of corsetry.
So, it seems pretty obvious what I dreamed about , right?
Wrong.
I dreamed Ms.Johannson and I were merely friends, though i had a bit of a crush on her but was too afraid to ask her out. We went to an Indian Casino and after a few inappropriate remarks about aboriginal peoples by Ms.Johannson (which we felt bad for but laughed at) we sat down to some table games. Over a table of blackjack she started talking about some sort of meditation involving an egg and lots of focussing.
Then I decided she was pretentious and woke up.
I couldnt get with this:
And I control my goddamn dreams. I personally blame the melon.

oh , and as for the photo request...

Friday was shoel's birthday which means :

a) best house for a party ever

b) better decorations than your kids will buy you for your 75th birthday

Some sort of craziness ensued.

(where is Gorrman's hat?)

As usual Marek climbed in things and I got too drunk to function.
Which is undoubtedly why i took this picture.
Then the next day we had a dinner party I didnt take many pictures at.

The quality of this one is an indication why.

For more photos , harass Yuka/Rhianna.

Lots of love

CAM

Our debauchery is more lacklustre than ever. I'm sorry.
Katie was trying that green beret choppity around the fingers knife thing but here it looks like she's just sawing warren's hand
Here she explains the trick and/or who gave her those mardi gras beads for showing "the goods"
Marek's hair makes him look irresponsible but in reality he used to always drive me to the bus stop and if it was too late, let me sleep on his couch

Oh also he almost got me arrested for being in the ocean, semi-convinced me to spy on people peeing, thought that my plan to light his car on fire was good, and tried to get me to surf on the roof of a car being drunk-driven....

Remember how these guy's crazy fighting over a lady almost ruined my BRB party. Now they're a team though...I dont know....I just dont know
Here mike is either bored with girl talk or mad at Kellen. someone told me I had to take this picture. I dont remember why.

School is systematically robbing me of energy and joy.

CAM

Final Edmonton Holiday Update:

THIS is for everyone who complains about me making up words. They will make me a millionare. Cromulent and Dickety will always be close to my heart.

But the important thing of the day is I spent it reading book after book on my family history:

Things that run in my extended family
- lukemia
- alcoholism
- divorce
- miscarriages
- poorly named children

People in my family who, from their names are clearly from Alberta and/or Porn Stars
- Spike
- Butch
- Jock (2)
- Ruby
and last but certainly not least
- Holly Wood.

Strange and Hilarious Tragedies to fall upon my family
- Getting hit on the head with a baseball and having a violent personality change
- 3 , count 'em, 3 orphans who don't know anything about their families
- Getting terminal lukemia in the 70s and it never killing them, nor having any doctors being able to explain why to this very day
- Husband takes money you gave him for christmas presents and uses it to buy women's lingere for himself.

Well, thats it for Edmonton. If you care Goeal-wise I got around 17 script treatments done in 24 days and am god fucking damn proud of it(hey everyone, hire me as your personal writer). Sure, 1/3 are probably undoable or crap but there's some solid stuff. Lets just say Parapalegic Bullriders, Boxes of severed penises, Canine Murder, Accidental sex, Hate Marriages, Gay bathouses, Viking/Herpes Metaphors, Out-Prostituting Prostitutes, Dr.Who Novels, Robot Minions, Secret Identities, Cross-dressing, Menacing the handicapped, AIDS fun runs, Self-Multilation, Miscarriage and Girls Gone Wild may or may not show up as part of my future award winning short film. I know you hope its the Penises.

Anyways we all know how it will end up being

Danke Alex

See you all in Vancouver. I still love you Edmonton. Even if you keep trying to revitalize downtown.

CAM

P.S. (If you didn't know) the show Dock, Dan Pinese, Warren and I voted best hour of t.v. which never panned out "Hatching , Matching and Dispatching" returns with new episodes to the CBC on friday. I'm already laughing remembering that blind kid.